The Original Scam

Fresh out of the womb, human needs are basic and universal: warm milk, clean linen, and a comforting shoulder. The supply should be plentiful.
There are no requisition forms for the newborn child to complete but the formula for satisfying these needs is easy to follow. One obnoxious cry should be sufficient to have the milk delivered. Add some poop to the Pampers and clean underwear is on the way. Yawn in Mother’s face and a soft shoulder beckons. This is the family way.
But not all newborns get clean linen. The comforting shoulder may feel like a rock and the Pampers might only be changed every fifth poop. The helpless infant records all these slights on an invisible deposit slip at the memory bank. The loud obnoxious cry is never completely silenced. It just reverses direction and bellows across that internal landscape known as the soul. Neglect breeds substitution.
There is no 800-number for a Family Replacement Bureau but the streets are willing and eager to provide a mock family. Basic human needs denied in their infancy morph into still-born emotions which can be cradled by streetlight. Upon reaching an alleged state of maturity, a child will find no shortage of illicit and illegal pleasures available to fill the emotional gap. Real scams are sure to follow.
To scam is to manipulate others for one’s personal benefits and we need “personal benefits” from Day One of our lives but start out with absolutely no control over their access other than that loud original scam.
No word in the English language has more synonyms than Help! But the crazy thing is most of those synonyms are not even words and the neglected infant learns them all.