Did he really say that?

The kind of humor I like is the thing that makes me laugh for five seconds and think for ten minutes = GEORGE CARLIN...Stained glass, engraved glass, frosted glass–give me plain glass = JOHN FOWLES...Music is the mathematics of the gods = PYTHAGORAS...Nothing is more fluid than language = R.L.SWIHART

Thursday, August 2, 2012

Midnight Exchange For Miller the Chihuahua

Miller's last dream in his vacation home involved the controversial Trader Jones' Walk-Thru Exchange Window. Usage of this window discriminates against non-canine customers.

"I would like to exchange these six degrees of Kevin Bacon for some gluten-free high-octane low-impact Bacon Beggin'Strips separated into curiously cubic-inch chunks."
"The six degrees cost $1.89 and the gluten-frees, with labor surcharge, cost $7.29. The difference is $5.40
"Please describe your master."

"He's not my master. He's a rental and he's wearing a white Langston Hughes t-shirt that he's had since the last millennium. You'll probably find him sipping coffee and flirting with the food sampler."
"We know him well. He once wrote a letter to the Trader Jones Headquarters demanding that whenever an Aretha Franklin song is played through a store public address system, all customers should dance with the nearest stranger."
"Yeah. that's him. He got the idea from my master. They used to teach together. My master was the basketball coach and, at half-time, the cheerleaders always danced the Swim to Aretha's CHAIN OF FOOLS. Hey, tell me something: if a Trader Jones' product are not gluten-free, how much do the glutens cost?"
"Cute. But no Kibbles. Why does every chihuahua insist on telling that joke?"
"We learned it from the Taco Bell chihuahua. He made so much money from those commercials, he opened a Canine Comedy Club. You want to hear another joke."
"No thank you."

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