Not a radio but a ratio, a comparison of two numbers.
Developed by the Institute of Inane Research, KQIQ stands for
Kowtow Quotient & Intelligence Quotient.
Most people understand what is meant by assigning a number value
to personal intelligence (IQ). The number value created by the Inane researchers
for Kowtow Quotient is determined by one’s readiness to figuratively bend over
backwards to please someone or bend down to shine
someone else’s shoes, literally or figuratively.
The more visibly agreeable the sense of attitude one has
in a new work environment, the higher the KQ.
To succeed on a new job, aptitude (IQ) is desirable but attitude is essential.
The wrong attitude towards superiors or the team spirit of an enterprise
is a quick ticket out the door, intelligence notwithstanding.
In the lingo of Inane Research:
Display more intellect than kowtowability and the new job will be short-lived.IQ > KQ —> A Pink Slip
When processed through the Piscataway Slangometer, this translates to
Before you can kick ass on a job, you must know how to kiss ass.
When Kowtow Quotient equals Intelligence Quotient, you get a form of equalityKQ = IQ —> Mediocrity
where aptitude doesn’t speak louder than words but mediocrity
can breed job security.
As the Slangometer, in a nautical mode, tells it:
Don’t rock the boat, remain in your seat,
leave the sailing to the salient,
and you can safely
and sanely make it
to the other shore.
Job security is Sanity’s favorite uncle. Few things in life create
a greater comfort zone than knowing one’s job is secure.
But...when the promotions are realized and the tenured bell tolls,KQ > IQ —> Promotions
you can “kiss your ass-kissing days goodbye.”
Then you can point your aptitude toward the sky
and you may end up owning a piece of that boat.
In the process, do be kind
to the newcomers
on the job.
Blogger's Notes
The Institute of Inane Research, an affiliate of the Lewis Carroll School of Logic,
is based in Piscataway, New Jersey.
The next Inane page is here.
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