Did he really say that?

The kind of humor I like is the thing that makes me laugh for five seconds and think for ten minutes = GEORGE CARLIN...Stained glass, engraved glass, frosted glass–give me plain glass = JOHN FOWLES...Music is the mathematics of the gods = PYTHAGORAS...Nothing is more fluid than language = R.L.SWIHART

Monday, March 18, 2013

DuTramp Trump Card (LBj-MdT #2)

Marcel DuTramp's t-shirt had a
MaGreetingon the reverse side:

That is where the dis-similarity between Ernest Hemingway and the long-lost self-proclaimed
Resident Artist of the Long Beach Jetty
Marcel looked just like the face on his t-shirt. He had the same body type: a burly blend of confidence and arrogance.
White-bearded Marcel had the tan of a man who spent two months in the Florida Keys
(or maybe cruising around the world with Mrs. Incognito & Mr. Incommunicado)

The title phrase of (LBj-MdT #1)--The Jetty is not for Everyone was a quote from
Mr. Almost Hemingway.
The designations of the three fishermen, the "Peripets" and #3, were anointed by DuTramp.
It was fisherman #3 who caled me Bloggy, another Dutrampian coignage.
Marcel pointed to another graffiti stain and demanded I "shoot" it.

"This jetty is my novel in waiting, Bloggy. Tell me what you see book-ending the graffitied boulders."
"I see green...There is flora...in the sea below is the fauna."
"Precisely. The pair of plants, growing between the stones, are called ambiguas."
"Sounds like 'ambiguous.'"
"You're good, Bloggy...And here is my trump card."
"Thank you, sir. to what do I owe this honor?"

"Just unfold the damn thing, will you please."

It unfolded like a map. The card became a parchment with a biblical opening line...
In the beginning...

In the beginning, I was a paper clip.
In the end, I was an Assistant Vice President at the Milk of Motherhood Insurance Company.

Somewhere in the middle, I saved two hundred and fifty-tree jobs by sleeping with the boss’s wife but it wasn’t the boss of Motherhood. It was the boss of Klezmer Insurance: Chief Executive Officer Ira Klezmer.
His company wanted to buy out Motherhood and fire more than half of the staff until Mrs. Klezmer came to the rescue.

Under the influence of Johnny Walker Red and the silk sheets of a Radisson Hotel, she told me of her husband’s sexual peccadillos. Then gave me pictures to prove it.
Mr. K did creative things with carrots while roller-skating naked with three teenage girls.

Mr. Klezmer then received a parcel with multiple Xeroxes of four roller-skaters under a midnight moon. An attached note read: “...Consider the consequences.” It was signed by Bobby Bullhorn Oreltz.

Not only was the Motherhood buy-out dead in the water but the following year, Klezmer Insurance was bought out by Metropolitan Life.

In the end, I retired at an early age with a reasonable comfort zone and much more friends than enemies....Things could be worse.

The next Marcel DuTramp page is here


Anonymous said...

What is that black line on the top of the last photo?

Paul Oliverio said...

Thank you for asking:

That is the "twin jetty" a/k/a the SEAL BEACH JETTY...The Northern border of Orange County

The Long Beach Jetty is the Southern border of Los Angeles County